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[26 Feb 2008|08:55pm] |
so I've been binging like no other this past week.....
I just want to eat, i'm not hungry, i just want to eat.
Sigh, i'm never going to get down to my ideal weight.
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[02 Jan 2008|08:35am] |
So New Years was really good, really, really, really good.
I'm so glad I went, and I'm so glad that certain people didn't show up...that would have ruined my whole night.
Well let's see where this takes me....
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[13 May 2007|01:41pm] |
My birthday basically sucked...I should really stop expecting anything more. Things just don't work out. I have bad luck...end of story.
However one thing that didn't suck was the My Chemical Romance concert. It was amazing, even though leading up to it sucked, and after it sucked, those couple of hours made up for everything.
I got there minutes before they took the stage, and it only took me and Stef one song before we reached the front. It was there that we danced the night away, I'm sure the people around us thought we were retarded, but really who cares? And when they brought out the cake and sang happy birthday...I pretended that it was for me. Hahah I love how lame I am.
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[25 Apr 2007|07:37pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 indescribable |
] |
Augh, I always feel like I should write in here, and I want to write in here. I just never know what to say.
Life has been very interesting this past month. I ended a two and a half relationship because I knew it wasn't going to work out, and I haven't been really happy in awhile. I finished school with one of the worst averages I've ever had, and I'm back at home for the summer with parents that I just don't seem to get along with, and friends that don't really seem to care.
Gah....I just feel like utter and complete shit right now. Why can't life ever been good, and pain free, and not so fucking confusing? Seriously...just one pain free day would be awesome.
I start work on the 30th, I'm looking forward to that. Sitting at home all day is giving me too much thinking time. That's all I seem to be doing these days. Thinking about the past, thinking about the future, thinking about all the things I've fucked up in my life. As soon as I start working I wont have time to think so much, plus I'll be making money, and getting an awesome tan while I'm at it.
Not being in a relationship right now, it so fucking weird. For the past two and a half years there's always been someone there, I've always felt loved, I've always known that I had someone. And now...I feel lost. I feel alone, and scared. I know I made the right decision it needed to be over, but still it feels really, really weird.
School is a whole different story. I just don't fucking care anymore. I only have one year left, and then I guess I'm supposed to start working. But what if I made the wrong decision...what if this isn't what I'm supposed to be doing with my life? I honestly feel like that right now. Shouldn't I like school? Shouldn't I be excited to learn about everything. Instead I barley make it to class, and then I find myself not paying attention to whats going on. I don't know. Maybe next year will be better. It has to be better.
I keep telling myself that this summer is going to be the best on yet. And it actually started off that way. I had an awesome weekend with one of my best friends, and everything seemed to be right. But now, it seems to be falling apart, promises are being broken and lies are being told.
I just want everything to work out. I want to feel like I'm doing the right thing.
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[06 Apr 2007|10:20am] |
we broke up, or were breaking up...I'm so confused I don't even know what our status is. We were so close to making it, 2 more months and he was going to be home, we were going to be together again.
I can't really handle all this right now, I'm emotionally drained.
My grandmas wake is tomorrow, and I have finals every single day until the 20th.
My life is just so awesome.
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[17 Mar 2007|02:50pm] |
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mood |
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 sad |
] |
My grandma died today.
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| augh |
[11 Mar 2007|10:23am] |
| [ |
mood |
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rejected |
] |
I feel like an absolute idiot, I really fucked up on my last anatomy test. Sigh, time to work my ass of in hopes that I can still pull off a good mark.
I'm going to look at a house today for next year. Hopefully it's nice, and we get it. I have more important things to worry about, other than trying to find a house for nest year. This school year has gone by SO fast, it's absolutely insane. One more month left and then I only have one year left....and then I'm done. Scary, I don't want to be in the 'real world'
It's Saint Patricks day next week. I really excited. Kistin might being coming up to visit me, I hope she does. Together I think we can represent the Irish well.
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[17 Feb 2007|09:21am] |
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mood |
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 ecstatic |
] |
Guess who get's to see My Chemical Romance in Toronto on her 21st birthday?
ME!
HURRAY!
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| hmmmm |
[28 Jan 2007|07:48pm] |
So im convinced that this place in haunted.....and so are my roomates. I live on the top floor, but I always hear noises coming from above. It sounds like people are running, and jumping. Sometimes I heard REALLY loud thuds, they actually wake me up at night. And the neighbours say that stuff actually falls off their fridge. YIKES!
In other news, I had a really good workout today! makes me happy
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| good times |
[23 Jan 2007|01:03am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 tired |
] |
Just got back from the Hedley concert
it was awesome
I actually managed to make it to the front, and then keep my spot there. I was impressed with my elbowing skills.
We stayed super late after the show but only one of the band members came out..lame. and then we got kicked out.
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[14 Jan 2007|05:32pm] |
So I'm back at school, everythings blah again.
I feel like nothing fun and exciting ever happens here, its rather lame.
I'm going to see Hedley on the 22nd. I will obviously be drunk, which will make it even better.
I'm excited about it
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[31 Dec 2006|03:30pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 calm |
] |
Going to Guelph tonight, should be a good time
Happy New Year everyone!!!!!
may 2007 be everything you want and more
1. If you could give just one word for '06 what would it be?
meh
2. What are your favorite memories of 2006?:
I can't really think of any, which is upsetting. I guess this year wasn't that great.
3. From 1-10 how would you rate this year?
maybe a 4?
4. If you could change one thing about '06 what would it be?
I should have gone out and done more things. Probably not worked at the golf corse in the summer...went to more concerts.
5. If you could rewind back to one moment what would it be?
going to the zoo with Mike.
1. Did you make any new friends?
yeah
2. Do you think any of your friends have changed?
not really
3. Do you still have the same friends you had in the beginning?
yup
4. Who would you say was your best friend overall this year?
Stef
5. Who are your closest friends?
Stef and Kristin
Life-
1. Do you have any regrets for this year?
not anything major
2. Has a lot changed in your life?
not really
3. Do you think you have changed?
no
4. Do you have a New Years resolution?
I need to take charge, and figure out what I really want in life.
Relationships-
1. Have you had any heartbreaks this year?
nope
2. Did you break any?
nope
3. Did you meet someone special?
nope
4. Have you fallen in love?
I already was
In '06 have you:
[x] Kissed anyone
[x] Hugged anyone
[ ] Been out of state
[x] Gone on vacation
[ ] Failed a class
[x] Been camping
[x] Ridden a roller coaster
[ ] Gone snow boarding
[ ] Played laser tag
[ ] Been out of the country
[x] Fell asleep crying
[x] Wished you didn't do something
[x] Laughed so hard it hurt
[ ] Had surgery
[x] Been to a bonfire
[ ] Made smores
[x] Went tanning
[x] Made a mistake
[ ] Prank called anyone
[ ] Dyed your hair
[x] Chopped off a lot of your hair
[ ] Broken any bones
[ ] Been in a physical fight
[ ] Played hide and seek
[ ] Been to a funeral
[x] Said something to someone you wish you could take back
[ ] Been to the circus
[x] Shot a gun
[x] Passed out
[x] Played a sport
[x] Been to the hospital
[x] Lost your voice
[x] Gone to the zoo
[x] Been shopping
[x] Cooked your own food
[ ] Played paintball
[ ] Gone mudding
[ ] Ridden a motorcycle
[ ] Painted a room
[x] Lost weight
[x] Gained weight
[ ] Gone four wheeling
[x] Lost someone important to you
[x] Slept for over 12 hours
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[28 Dec 2006|06:52pm] |
So I didn't really have that great of a christmas.
Christmas morning at 7:00 we got a call from my uncle telling us that my grandpa was in the hosptial. So that really sucked.
Hes doing ok now, we went and visited him on boxing day, and I think he gets to go home tomorrow.
Other than that things were ok
I've just been seeing a bunch of family latley, nothing too exciting
hopfully tomorrow i can get together with some friends and go to the bar.
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[24 Dec 2006|10:10am] |
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mood |
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disappointed |
] |
So I'm not excited about christmas AT ALL! Like oh it's tomorrow..wooo?
I don't really know why, a couple of weeks ago I was so excited, I couldn't wait.
Maybe it's because there's no snow. I think this might be my second "brown" christmas ever, in 20 years. It saddens me.
It also could be the fact that my boyfriend is in China...but that just sucks all the time.
I miss him.
sigh
I am so the Scrooge right now.
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[18 Dec 2006|08:53pm] |
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Why isn't there any snow?!
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[15 Dec 2006|11:07am] |
So I have to finish this art essay by midnight...why must I put everything off until the last minute?
I also need to get a haircut today, and maybe do some christmas shopping. None of this is probably going to get done.
Oh well
theres always tomorrow.
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[14 Dec 2006|11:22am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 cheerful |
] |
So the OP yesterday wasn't as bad as I thought. And I did pass, but not with a very good mark. Im just upset because I know I messed up on a couple things. I just go through it too fast and mess everything up. Sigh, I need to work on that.
Anyway
I'M GOING HOME TODAY!!!!
fuckin right!
dinner tonight is going to me awsome, just cause I don't have to make it!
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[13 Dec 2006|09:53am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 scared |
] |
Im about to go write my last two finals. I'm so FUCKING scared. I hate OP's more than anything, cuase having a teacher standing over, you watching every movement you do, and not talking, is the worst this ever!!!
FUCK!
I need to get good on this, or im in trouble...
please don't let me fail
lol
IM SO SCARED
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[09 Dec 2006|04:36pm] |
Going out last night was such a bad idea.
I wasn't planing on doing anything this weekend, I was going to study. But nooo Joe had to have a party, and Russell was supposed to be there and I haven't seen him in awhile so I thought why not? I'll leave by 1:00 and be in bed by 2:00 and then I'll wake up and study my ass off for the rest of the weekend.
Yeah...so I ended up getting to bed at 5:00, and I woke up at 3:00. And right now I can't do anything because I feel like shit.
Clearly I drank too much.
But I had a lot of fun
so really that's all that matters.
Now lets hope that I don't fail out of school.
I miss him...
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[07 Dec 2006|02:41pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 weird |
] |
I feel really weird today.
I woke up, got out of bed and basically fell over. I honestly have no balance today. I was walking to the bathroom and I was all over the place. It's crazy.
I just feel really funny.
I suppose I should work on my portfolio. Seeing as it's due tomorrow. Knowing me I'm going to put it off until tonight, and end up pulling an all nighter.
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